The Greatest Resource We Have Access To

All of us, as human beings, have access to the greatest, most powerful, most amazing resource. It can cause a tough situation to turn around for good. It can cause a hurting relationship to heal. It can cure sicknesses. It can cause miracles to occur. I truly believe this resource can do all of the things I just listed and I am guilty, like many of us are, of not using this resource to its full capacity.

Prayer.

I am a firm believer in the power of prayer. After seeing the movie, TheWar Room, I was reminded of how amazing of a gift prayer is. We can go to God directly and ask Him for what we need and want and I believe He hears our prayers. The answers may not be exactly what we want, but if we truly trust God, we believe that He will work with our best interest in mind.

Even in believing all these things, I don't pray as often as I should. Why?  Two main reasons. The first is laziness. Naturally, I'm more of a listener than a talker. Since praying is a form of communicating, it takes effort for me to pray and sometimes I just get lazy. If I've had a busy day or a later evening out, most likely I'll get lazy and neglect my prayer time.

The second reason I don't pray is "there's nothing really to pray for".  At least, that's the lie I tell myself. Of course , that's not at all true. Look at the state of our country and our world. And I don't even believe that I've got everything in my own life under control. There are just points in my life where things are quiet and nothing's really happening that I need to make sure I pray for, so I give myself the excuse not to.

But no matter how life is going, when I think about how powerful prayer is, it feels silly to not take advantage of such an amazing gift. Besides that, for me, prayer is key to keeping my spiritual life strong. What kind of relationship would I have with my husband if I didn't talk to him? Probably not such a great one. The same is true about my relationship with God. And as with any relationship, it takes effort. But the benefits of this relationship are too great to not put in the work.

Here are a few scriptures to help encourage you and me to remember to take time to pray:
Scripture 1    Scripture 2  Scripture 3

May you and I make the time to tap into this great resource of direct access to God and may He show us His love, give us His peace, and bless us with the desires of our hearts.

Waiting For The Other Shoe To Drop

I tend to have a defense mechanism when things are going really good. I wait for the other shoe to drop. Meaning, I wait for something bad to happen. I almost expect it. And sometimes I'm right. Sometimes bad things do happen.

A few weekends back, I was leaving a great brunch with my friend for her birthday. It was a beautiful day with great food and great people. But then, the shoe dropped. A mystery, came-out-of- nowhere, double-parked cab and I had a slight incident as I was backing out of a parking spot. Thankfully, my friend was so amazing, and although the other party was a little irrational, (I'm rolling my eyes as I'm writing this),  the nice officers of Baltimore City completely had our back. I believe God used that situation to show me that when things go wrong, He'll provide the people and circumstances that will make it alright in the end.

A week or so ago, I was thinking about how great things were going in my life and then I had that feeling. Something's going to happen. Sure enough, I end up getting into a silly misunderstanding with my husband about chicken. Yes, chicken. But as silly as it was, God used that situation to show us both something about the way we communicate that will help us when future misunderstandings arise.

I still tend to expect the bad when things are going so good.  But I also tend to believe that God looks forward to those opportunities so that he can turn a bad situation all the way around. I even believe He wants to bless me in the process. So in that case, there's no point in dreading the dropping of the other shoe. If He's blessing me in the good times and if I believe He'll bless me in the midst of the bad times, it's a win-win.

I believe this for you, too. If things are going good for you, enjoy it and be grateful for it. But life does happen, and when it does, if you believe in God, prove it and trust in Him to help you through the difficult times. He has the power to take care of things so much better than we could ever try to on our own.

Here are some verses we can use to encourage ourselves in the good times and when the other shoe drops.
Verse 1   Verse 2   Verse 3

May we have the courage to be grateful and enjoy the good times but also trust God wholeheartedly when the other shoe does drop.

Thank you for reading.

Time and Worry

It's August and summer break is speeding by. From the time break started until now, there's been a reoccurring subject in my mind that I can't shake. Time. I've had about 6 or so weeks of time and I wanted to make it count. Trying to find the right balance of being productive and relaxing is a weekly task. And if there's a change in the weekly plan, I'm frustrated because the balance I've worked so hard to create is gone.

But let's talk about the fact that there are two weeks before BCPS teachers and staff return back to school. If I was trying to balance before, I'm really trying to maximize all my time now. Because soon all the free time I have will be gone and my schedule will no longer be mine to fully control.

In years past, I've become paralyzed with anxiety in the week or two before school begins. Time wasted. I'm fighting really hard to not give in to the anxiousness and to enjoy these last couple weeks, but this fight isn't one I can battle alone. Thankfully, I believe that I don't have to fight alone and I can look to God for encouragement.Check out this verse.

Turns out, He has a lot to say about time and worry about it. The following are my three favorite points God makes about our topic and the verses that support them. Whether you're a school employee getting ready for another school year, a person who has a lot on their plate and you don't know how and when you'll get it all done, or someone waiting on something and times seems to be passing you by, I hope this is an encouragement to you.

Point number 1- There are all different seasons in life and we'll experience good seasons and bad seasons in our lives. We can't control them and we shouldn't waste time trying to. In whatever season, we should just try to enjoy life as best we can. Check out this really cool version of a familiar passage. Verse 1

Point number 2- Be in the now. Don't worry about what may happen in the future. Good or bad, God's got us.   Verse 2

Point number 3- No matter what happens in our lives and when it happens, God has planned it for our good. And when it doesn't seem that way and we need Him, He will listen to us and help us. Verse 3

May we be brave enough to enjoy the time we have, no matter what we're facing. 

**Update: Just this morning, I had planned to go into school and start putting my room together. I checked my email before I left and was told there was absolutely no way I could come in today. I feel pretty out of sorts because of the abrupt change in my day. I'll be taking time this morning to read over those points of encouragement again.

Thanks for reading.

Maybe It's Just Me...

...and maybe this post pertains only to me. But after having a certain word repeat itself over and over again in my head for the past two days, I knew I needed to write about it.

It happens when I'm complimented for something I've done.
It happens when I look in the mirror and my hair, make-up and outfit all come together into one nice finished product.
It happens when I think on all the things I've accomplished in my career and in life.

But...

It also happens when I'm at a store and I see someone wearing something I don't find flattering or fashionable.
It also happens when I hear about someone's unfortunate situation and the first thing I think is, "That sucks, glad it's not me".
It also happens strangers, or even acquaintances, or worst yet, friends, make choices and decisions that I would not make and I think about them judgmentally. (Yea, it happens)

Pride. (Click on the word and read the first paragraph of Wikipedia's definition of pride to see its positives and negatives.)

My first three examples are ok in moderation and with perspective. My last three examples make me feel ashamed of myself. However, I'm glad that this word came to mind. It made me think of all of those examples and the changes I need to make, particularly in my thinking. It also made me think of a word I want to put more into practice.

Humility (Click on the word and read Wikipedia's definition)

Here are some scriptures on this topic of pride and humility.

Verse 1    Verse 2     Verse 3   Verse 4

Maybe it is just me that needed this gently brought to my attention. But on the off chance it's not just me, I hope you don't spend nearly as much time as I did beating yourself up about the first word. I hope we channel our energies into working hard implementing that second word.

Thanks for reading.

Just Relax

School's out for the summer. So that means this teacher gets to relax. Well, after the two days of leadership trainings and the two days of technology professional developments I need to attend. But then, I get to relax. (Now if I was teaching summer school, as I've done many years past, I would say, "No I can't". I'd be getting my classroom set up and looking over lesson plans.) But this year, I can say, Yes I can". This summer, I get to relax. I'm really grateful to have time off before the next school year starts, but there's a little problem. I don't quite know how to relax. I tend to feel like there's something I should be doing instead of taking time to rest. Often times, I feel guilty for sleeping in or sitting on the couch and watching a tv show or two.

But I would take this feeling of unrest any day over the restlessness of trying to make an important life decision, facing a stressful situation, or dealing with an unexpected health issue. These circumstances can quickly consume us and erase any opportunity of relaxation or peace. That is, unless you have a Source to turn to that can give you the comfort and rest you need.

Whether you're looking to find rest from the stress of a decision, the shock of unpleasant news, or the rigorous nature of a busy career or lifestyle, God desires to take on our burdens and concerns and exchange them for peace and rest. All we have to do is believe that He can and that He will.

Here are some verses reminding us that God encourages our rest and relaxation.

Verse 1   Verse 2    Verse 3

No matter what situation we find ourselves in, may we find time to rest our bodies and minds, relax our busy schedules, and reconnect with those we love and care about.

Below are a few places where I've been blessed to find great rest:

Coronado Beach in San Diego, CA

Airlie Center in Warrenton, Va

Matt's Awesome Uncle Mike and Aunt Mary's home in Stuart, Fl

Fling Family B&B in Hillsboro, Ohio

Centennial Park in Columbia, 

All Too Much

Have you ever felt like the stuff going on in your life was too much? Have you ever been in that "when it rains, it pours" situation? That's where I find myself at the moment. But before I continue with this blog, I want to make sure you know that I'm not sharing so that this blog or my Facebook page can be littered with comments of sympathy and "I'm so sorry", although I know that would be a sincere response by many of you. I'm sharing to encourage you if you ever find yourself feeling like I'm feeling. I'm sharing to encourage and remind myself that there IS hope.

I was blessed to spend Mother's Day with my mom and dad last week. This year has been very difficult for mom, as she suffers from anxiety and depression. The fact that she was coming to Baltimore to visit felt like a big deal. But it didn't take long at all to see that the woman with my dad wasn't my mom. She was nervous, she was anxious. She was quiet. She tried really hard to interact and talk with people, but that's just it; my mom wouldn't have had to try. And as we finished dinner and she anxiously and impatiently waits for the waiter to bring our check, the reality set in. This isn't my mom, and I don't know when I'll see her again.

Friday she was admitted into the hospital for the third time this year. My heart breaks for the lack of peace she's experienced for so long and selfishly it longs for what's been absent for months. It's all too much.

Saturday I went car shopping to replace my poor Prius that was totaled a few weeks ago. I found a car I liked at a price we were comfortable with, at a dealership close by. After visiting in the morning, I found that I liked the model and it seemed like we could reach a deal with the price but I would have to return at another time to test drive the actual car I wanted since it wasn't inspected yet. I arrived back later that evening, test drove the car in the wind and rain, and was ready to cut a check and make the purchase. And this is where our seemingly happy story takes a turn. Cue in finance guy. He proceeds to tell me that the monthly payment I was looking at was numerically impossible and he had no idea how I got the figure that I did. (Mind you, the figure I was working with was given to me by the dealership's sales associate) As I tried to explain, he continued to talk over me, over and  again . Finally I stopped and said that I didn't appreciate how he was speaking to me. I asked him to stop speaking over me and to let me finish my....and I couldn't even finish that sentence without him speaking over me again. At that point I told him I was finished, I kindly picked up my pocketbook and left. That was all too much.

Saturday night I get a text message from my dad that his older sister had passed away. Aunt Dinky (Mary Ellen) battle cancer for years and fought hard. But there came a point where her body was too weak to handle the chemo. She had a beautiful smile and would always tell me how proud of me she was when we were together. Looking at her was like looking into the eyes of my grandmother and I'll miss that about her very much. This is all too much.

Saturday night I had a decision to make. I supposed to sing with my church's choir the next day. It was going to be a long day. I'm exhausted.  I'm stressed.  But I chose to go. I know that's what mom and Aunt Dinky would want me to do. Because despite everything going on, all that I've shared and all that I haven't, I believe that God is still good. I still have things to thank Him for. It's Sunday evening and I'm still exhausted. I'm still stressed. But I sang and I was loved well today. I'm so grateful for that.

My good friend Nikki spoke at church today and she taught from Hebrews 10:19-22 which tells us that because Jesus paid for all of our sins, there isn't a barrier between us and God. We can come to Him boldly with our requests, our needs, our hurts, our fears, our joys, our successes and our failures. I believe Romans 8:28 where it says that God works everything together for good. I believe my mom is going to have an incredibly powerful testimony that will inspire so many people. I believe the car situation will work out in my favor. And I believe that my aunt is celebrating the ultimate victory in heaven with her mom, dad, and daughter. It IS all too much to deal with by myself. I'm grateful to believe I don't have to.

Here are some promises that I hold tightly to, that I hope will encourage you.
Promise verse 1   Promise verse 2   Promise verse 3   Promise verse 4

May we know and believe we have hope, even when things seem all too much.

Love Tap

My first reaction was, "seriously, this can not be happening to me again." But as I sat with spilled coffee on the floor of my car and air bags I didn't even know I had, deployed, I came to the realization that "yup it's happening again". I got hit. As I sit, smelling the mix of coffee and airbags and car rubble, I just shake my head and say "Alright God, it's happening to me again. Have Your way in this situation." And He did. The young driver was apologetic and made sure I was ok. A kind lady, who was an off duty EMT stayed with me and made sure I was fine. An older gentleman made sure to give me his name and number to give to the police officer as a witness to what happened.  My principal at work stopped to see that I was ok and our amazing guidance counselor stayed with me until Matt came. Countless coworkers, who were driving to work, paused when they saw Karen and I to see if I was ok and if we needed anything. The officer on duty said that I must be pretty popular. I thought to myself, "No, but I am incredibly blessed". Another blessing was that Matt was off from work, so he was able to pick me up, retrieve the belongings from my torn-up, towed car, and drive us home.  Later on that afternoon, I received a call saying that other party was accepting liability for the
accident. Huge weight lifted. I knew it wasn't my fault, but I was grateful the other party was truthful and I wasn't going to have to engage in a long process of proving my innocence.

Kind strangers, caring coworkers, loving husband, favorable outcome. Oh I forgot to mention that I walked away with only a bruised leg and sore chest and neck. Later on that evening it became clear to me what had happened. God gave me a love tap.

Not always in the form of an accident, thank God, but I do find that this happens to me wh
en I get a little complacent in my relationship with Him. When things are going well and the urgency to connect and pray isn't as strong. When life is just rolling along ok and I don't pause as often to be grateful for what I have. Love tap. You wanna know what my last "love tap" was? Wocka 3 :-)  (Read my first blog if you have no idea what I'm talking about)

A "love tap" is that thing that happens kind of out of the blue when things in life are going along just fine and then BAM, it hits.  A loss, an accident, a sickness. I don't know what "love taps" have happened in your life, but I do know that when it happens, it doesn't feel like love. My first reaction is usually "why is this happening to me?"

In my life, it happens to me when God is telling me I'm getting a little too far away and He wants that closeness back. And I can't argue with Him. In fact, before the "love tap", there's usually something inside of me saying "you know you're getting a little too far away." But do I put in the effort I should to prevent that? Not always. But here's the cool thing,. Even though the "love tap" situation is usually crummy, God always shows His love and care for me and shows up when I need Him to. When I give the situation to Him, He always comes through in amazing ways. Those blessings in the midst of the "love tap" make me wonder why I ever let myself get too far away.

If and when you find yourself in what you think might be a "love tap" situation, here are a few verses that may be helpful to read and meditate on:
Love tap verse 1    Love tap verse 2 
(This last verse is a full chapter but it was too good to cut it off. Love Tap verse 3

May we chose to view those unexpected, unwanted, crummy circumstances that happen in our lives as love taps from a God who loves us, desires a close relationship with us, and longs to bless us beyond our dreams.

Thank you for reading!

Take The Gift

I have a couple very distinct memories that come to mind when I recall my first year serving in my church's choir.  Memories of very kind and very nice people giving me compliments about my appearance or my outfit and I would give them at least 3 reasons why I didn't deserve it. ("This is just something that was in my closet that I didn't have to iron. "This dress is old." "My hair isn't doing what I want it to at all.") Then one day it dawned on me. The people giving me these kind words of affirmation wouldn't go out of their way to lie to me and they don't owe me anything. So why am I wasting all this energy telling them that they're wrong, and, instead, just say thank you and take the gift?

In the first year of my marriage, when my husband would say something really sweet to me or want to be affectionate towards me, my first reaction would be to deflect the comment or to push him away. ("He must want something; that's the only reason he'd be doing all this.") Then one day it dawned on me. Before he and I got together,  I prayed that God would bring me an awesome man who would be affectionate and complimentary and make me feel special. Why can't I just be grateful and take the gift?

Why do some of us find it difficult to just accept a really good gift, whether it's the blessing of a wonderful partner or friend, a kind word, or help at a difficult time?  I can't answer for you, but for me, it had to do with what I thought about myself.  When I joined my church's choir, my opinion of myself wasn't very high, so when I received those compliments, I couldn't believe people were saying such nice things because I didn't believe those things about myself. It was only after I started to just say thank you that I was on the road to changing what I believed and felt about myself. When my husband would say or do something really wonderful, deep down I felt undeserving and felt as if I couldn't do enough to prove that I was. As the months have gone by and we approach our 2nd anniversary, I've come to realize that I didn't need to validate his choice in marrying me. It was his decision to ask me to be his wife. He chose me and he continues to choose me each day.

Sometime I have similar feelings when God gives me a really great opportunity or blessing. ("This is too much." "I don't deserve this." " I guess something bad is going to happen soon because things are too good.") Sometimes it hard for me to just say thank you and accept the gift. I'm so glad that God doesn't bless us based on our performance, our character, or our good deeds because we'd never measure up. We should all strive to be good citizens in our world and be kind to each other but even on our best days, we aren't good enough. But God loves us and that's why He gives us good gifts; because He just wants to and He really likes to.  All He asks is that we are grateful. We don't have to prove anything or try to earn anything. All we need to do is just say thank you and accept the gift.

Here are some verses about our Good Gift-Giving God.
Verse 1   Verse 2   Verse 3

May we believe the good things about ourselves, believe in God's goodness towards us, and receive the good things He gives.

Wocka 3

As 2015 arrived this January, a new student arrived in my kindergarten classroom. This poor kid had a reputation before he ever got in the building. His report card told of poor attendance and even worse behavior and his previous principal called mine to warn of his arrival. I was determined to give the poor guy a fair shot and things were ok at the start. He had manners, he was intelligent, and he seemed to know the basics of being a student. Unfortunately, that honeymoon stage came to an end and he has now taken on the persona of Wocka, a name I've affectionately given my behaviorally challenged students based on the story of the first "Wocka" ; I'll have to tell that one another time. It started with trouble following directions and being combative with his specials teachers, but soon it turned into frustration in the classroom when we wasn't called on and anger when the classwork became a little challenging. Yelling, kicking, ripping papers, throwing school supplies....Wocka 3.

After the initial shock of  "is this really happening in my classroom", it dawned on me that, at times, my behavior isn't so different than Wocka's. I don't like to be told what to do and I get an attitude sometimes when I'm made to do something that I don't want to do. I get frustrated when a task is challenging. I've wanted to and have thrown things in anger when I don't feel considered, important, or appreciated. 

We don't see many students that behave the way Wocka does because, thankfully, there aren't that many 5 and 6 year-olds who have been through enough hard life stuff to manifest behavior so extreme. But unfortunately, every now and again, we, teachers come across a few that have and it's unsettling and difficult to handle, especially with a room full of 23 or so other students that need you too.

As adults, many of us HAVE been through enough hard life stuff that it makes some of our behavior choices seem excusable. But is it really acceptable? Is the choice of words we use when we're upset acceptable? Are our actions when we're upset acceptable? 

Children are given the tools to handle their feelings and control their frustrations. We, adults, provide the consistency and structure they need to help promote better behaviors and choices. But as adults, no one is making us set boundaries or make better behavioral choices. If we are self aware enough to know that our relationships are being affected by how we choose to relate within them, it is our own responsibility to decide to do things differently. We can read books or go to counseling. We have options. But it's up to us to do the work.

My faith and belief in God has been my greatest source in navigating through all of issues I've faced in my life and has been particularly instrumental in my current Wocka episode. Here are a few verses that have encouraged me:
Encouragement Link 1   Encouragement Link 2    Encouragement Link 3

Lastly, here are a couple verses to encourage each of us as we change the "Wocka" in ourselves:
Change verse 1   Change verse 2

May you and I be brave enough to look at our behaviors and our choices this week and consider if there is something we should change.

Thanks for reading.

28th grade

One year of kindergarten, 12 years of grade school, 4 years of college and, no, my educational experience hasn't finished yet. There are academic components such as earning my master degree and on going professional development courses to keep my teaching certification. But there are life components that have taught me the biggest lessons. Life components such as building and maintaining friendships, falling in love and getting married, dealing with family ups and downs, growing in my faith and relationship with God and  navigating through each day of teaching kindergarten for the last 11 years. This is how I find myself presently in 28th grade (13 years of school, 4 years of college, 11 years of teaching, masters, and PD courses). So many important things I've learned and have learned; sometimes too many lessons at one time. Some lesson are just too good to keep to myself so if you're willing to read, I'm willing to share.